I have no idea how to create pages but I'll figure it out eventually godammit

Thursday, December 13, 2018

ON THE FIRST DAY OF CARDMAS

A GODDAMN XMAS MIRACLE HAPPENED

LOOK AT THIS A REAL FUCKIN POST FROM ME

A BIGGER MIRACLE WILL BE IF I SEE THIS SHIT OUT THRU ALL TWELVE DAYS, I STILL DON'T HAVE EVERYTHING SCANNED YET

AND YES I'M GOING TO BE YELLING THE WHOLE TIME. THIS YEAR HAS ME VERY YELLY AND THE ONLY WAY I'M GOING TO MAKE IT THRU TWELVE DAYS OF POSTING IS TO PRETEND I'M RUNNING FULL SPEED AND SCREAMING THE WHOLE TIME TO KEEP UP THAT SENSE OF URGENCY

OH YEAH FIRST DAY I GOT

 1997 PINNACLE DENNY'S GRAND SLAM PACK

ONE CARD IN THE PACK AND YOU HADDA EAT A BIG GREASY PLATE O' FOOD TO GET ONE

ACTUALLY I THINK YOU COULD BUY A BUNCH OF PACKS AT A TIME, AND YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO EAT THE FOOD, YOU COULD SNEAK IT ONTO SOMEONE ELSE'S PLATE WHEN THEY WEREN'T LOOKING. STILL HAD TO PAY EXTRA FOR THE PACKS THO


LOOK AT THAT CHECKLIST. JUST LOOK A WHILE THERE'S NO WAY YOU'RE READING THAT UNSCANNABLE MESS. BASICALLY 1 CARD PER TEAM WITH A BONUS JACKIE ROBINSON YOU'LL NEVER GET OUT OF A PACK. IN A QUARTER BOX TWENTY YEARS LATER MAYBE, BUT NOT IN A PACK. ONE PLAYER PER TEAM MEANS STARS STARS STARS BABY. GOT ANDRUW JONES AND DAVE JUSTICE FOR THIS BRAVES FAN. A-ROD BONDS MCGUIRE SOSA THOMAS BAGWELL CLEMENS PIAZZA VLAD LARKIN

JOHNNY FUCKIN JAHA!!!!!!!!!!

LET'S SEE WHAT SUPERSTAR HALL OF FAMER AWAITS


RAY LANKFORD

GOD DAMMIT

OH WELL IT'S STILL LENTICULAR 3-D-ISH DENNYS CARDINAL ACTION

KELLOGG'S 3-D, NOT SPORTFLICS 3-D, BUT STILL 3-D

I THINK THAT'S A CUB IN THE BACKGROUND BUT HAVE NO IDEA WHO IT IS AND NO DESIRE TO LOOK IT UP. LET'S CHECK OUT THE BACK


HOLOGRAMS DON'T SCAN WORTH A ASS AND I'M  TOO LAZY TO GIF A VIDEO OFF MY SHITTY OLD PHONE CAMERA. JUST IMAGINE HOW AMAZING AND SHINY THAT HOLOGRAM IS. KEEP IMAGINING BECAUSE THE ACTUAL HOLOGRAM IS JUST A FLAT PHOTO WITH SOME STOCK FANS IN THE STANDS AS A BACKGROUND SO WHATEVER YOU THOUGHT OF IS WAY BETTER. OL' RAY WAS A PRETTY DAMN GOOD PLAYER IN '96, LOTS OF WARS AND VORPS IN THAT STAT LINE ASSUMING THEY DON'T PENALIZE HIM FOR STEALS. I SHOULDN'T COMPLAIN TOO LOUDLY COULDA BEEN TRAVIS FRYMAN I SUPPOSE. OR JERKASS JETER THE STATUE KILLER



SINCE I'M ALREADY LOW-KEY STEALING THORZUL'S SCHTICK WITH THE CAPSLOCK, HERE'S A ADVENT CAL CHRISTMAS TREE TO SHOW OFF ALL MY BEEG MOJO HEETZ

TIL TOMORROW MY BIRD BROTHERS UP IN A FRUIT TREE

5 comments:

P-town Tom said...

Fairly certain that is Scott Servais behind the tools of ignorance.
That was a LOT of yelling! But, 'tis the season.

Ol Joe said...

Total HOF card. That is young mike Piazza behind the plate.

Nachos Grande said...

Lolz. I understand the yelling, 2018 was a year of a lot of yelling.

Fuji said...

Lol. Needed a good laugh to jumpstart my day.

Peter K Steinberg said...

MERRY F'ING CHRISTMAS.