EVEN MOAREREST PLAYOFFS

 IT'S BASKEYBAWL PLAYOFF TIME WHICH IS EXCITING BUT WILL MOST LIKELY END UP GOING BADLY FOR ME. SINCE I DID MY BASEBALL AND FEETSBALL TEAM RANKINGS WHY NOT DO BASKETBALL AS WELL. DON'T EXPECT HOCKEY THOUGH, I DO NOT KNOW NOR DO I CARE WHO'S GOOD IN THAT SPORT ANYMORE. TEAMS SHALL BE REPRESENTED BY COOL 90S INSERTS BECAUSE THEY ARE AWESOME AND WILL BE RANKED IN ORDER FROM BESTEST TO LEASTEST FAVORITE. ANYONE WHO HAS SEEN 57 POSTS ABOUT TRAE YOUNG ON THIS WEBSITE KNOWS WHO IS THE FAVORITERIST. I'LL STOP WITH THE RIDICULOUS SPELLING NOW

ATLANTA HAWKS

THE HAWKS ARE ONCE AGAIN IN THE PLAY-IN ROUND AS THE 10TH SEED IN THE EAST. THEY ARE 3-0 IN PLAY-IN GAMES BUT THEY ARE NOT GOING 5-0. THE TEAM IS A MESS, THE ROSTER DOESN'T FIT AND MOST OF THE BEST PLAYERS ARE BEAT UP TO HELL. I'LL STILL BE LISTENING TO STEVE HOLMAN CALLING THE GAME ON THE RADIO FOR AS LONG AS I CAN BUT I'M NOT FEELING GOOD ABOUT THIS ONE EVEN WITH TRAE PLAYOFF MAGIC IN THE MIX. THIS IS GOING TO BE A CRITICAL OFFSEASON, NO MORE SALARY CAP DUMPS PLEASE. IT'S SAD, THEY'VE GOT THE BEST PLAYER IN FRANCHISE HISTORY AND A LOT OF GOOD YOUNG TALENT ON THE ROSTER BUT CAN'T WIN AT EVEN A .500 CLIP

THE HAWKS STRESS ME OUT BUT THIS CARD DOES NOT. ALMOST COMICALLY SIMPLE COMPARED TO THE REST OF THE CARDS IN THIS POST, THIS 1992-93 ROOKIE SENSATIONS CARD HAS ALWAYS BEEN ONE OF MY FAVORITES. IT'S SO 90S! PURPLE? CHECK. GRADIENT? CHECK. CHUNKY COMPUTER GRAPHICS? CHECK. IT HELPED THAT AUGMON WAS MY FAVORITE PLAYER IN THE EARLY 90'S. HE KNOW HOW TO PLAY DEFENSE UNLIKE SOME OTHER PEOPLE I KNOW 

BOSTON CELTICS

I HATE THE BOSTON CELTICS. I HATE THEM SO BAD IT'S BLED OVER TO MOST OF NEW ENGLAND. FUCK OFF RHODE ISLAND! QUIT LOOKING SO SMUG, VERMONT! EAT SHIT, THE PARTS OF MAINE NOT HAUNTED BY A STEPHEN KING MONSTER! OOOOOOH I HATE THE GODDAMN CELTICS. BUT. THIS MIGHT BE AL HORFORD'S LAST CHANCE AT A RING. AND I LOVE AL HORFORD. HORFORD NEEDS A RING! GO GET HIM A RING YOU BASTARDS! DON'T CHOKE IT AWAY AGAIN LIKE YOU DID THE PAST TWO YEARS!!! FSGJHFSKAJGH

THE CELTICS MAKE ME MAD, THIS CARD IS KINDA COOL. AN INSERT FROM 1999-00 ULTRA, YOU GOT A GIANT CELTICS LOGO ON A PARQUET FLOOR WITH THE MOST AWKWARD PHOTO OF ANTOINE WALKER AVAILABLE AT THE TIME. THIS IS AN EXTRA-ODD INSERT SET AS BOSTON IS THE ONLY TEAM WITH A PARQUET FLOOR, THE ORIGINAL FLOOR WAS ACTUALLY RETIRED IN 1999, AND THE INSERT SET INCLUDES THE USUAL MIX OF PLAYERS FOR ALL DIFFERENT TEAMS. THIS ONE WITH A PLAYER WHO ACTUALLY PLAYED ON A PARQUET FLOOR SEEMS A LITTLE SPECIAL

MILWAUKEE BUCKS

MY NORMAL RANKING PROCESS OF TAKING TEAMS THAT HAVE WON A CHAMPIONSHIP THIS CENTURY AND TELLING THEM TO GO JUMP IN A LAKE IS NOT WORKING THIS TIME. EVEN THOUGH THEY WON A CHIP VERY RECENTLY I STILL SEE THEM AS A BUNCH OF SCRAPPY UNDERDOGS, ALBEIT ONE WITH A GIANT MONSTEROUS GREAT DANE THAT CAN RIP PEOPLE'S HEADS OFF IN THE PACK. I LIKE GIANNIS AND IT WOULD BE THE FUNNIEST THING EVER IF DOC RIVERS WON ANOTHER TITLE AFTER EVERYONE SHIT ALL OVER HIM FOR THE PAST DECADE SO IF THE ROTTEN CELTICS BLOW IT AGAIN ANOTHER TITLE FOR MILWAUKEE WOULD PLEASE ME. 

LATE 90S INSERTS WERE WILD, YO. EVERYTHING ESCALATED SO MUCH THAT BASE SETS LIKE FLEER TRADITION WERE POPPING OUT EMPBOSSED, TEXTURED, HOLOFOIL ENCRUSTED CARDS LIKE THIS ONE. THESE THINGS WERE 1:20 PACKS IN A 98-99 SET WHOSE THEME WAS THE 1961 FLEER DESIGN. GOD BLESS THE 90S

MINNESOTA TIMBERWOLVES

OK, BACK TO THE ACTUAL SCRAPPY UNDERDOGS. THE TIMBERWOLVES HAVE BEEN A COMPLETE TIRE FIRE FOR THEIR ENTIRE EXISTENCE. THEN THIS YEAR WITH BULLDOG LEGEND ANTHONY EDWARDS THEY LED THE WESTERN CONFERENCE FOR MUCH OF THE YEAR BEFORE BLOWING THE LAST GAME VS THE SUNS AND ENDING UP WITH THE 3RD SEED. BUT THAT JUST MAKES THEM SCRAPPIER! I'M WAY TOO HIPSTER ROOT FOR THE #1 SEED. THE ONLY DOWNSIDE TO A WOLVES TITLE IS THAT IT WOULD RUIN MY RUNNING JOKE THAT MINNESOTA SOLD THEIR SOUL FOR A 1991 TWINS TITLE AND ALL THEIR TEAMS WILL FAIL MISERABLY UNTIL THE SOUL OF KENT HRBEK IS DRAGGED DOWN TO HELL. NO ONE LIKES THAT JOKE BUT IT MAKES ME LAUGH

THIS ISN'T TECHNICALLY AN INSERT AS IT'S FROM THE 1992-93 UPPER DECK TEAM MVP HOLOGRAM SET. BUT REALLY, WOULD YOU RATHER SEE THIS OR SOME JUNKY INSERT OF CHRISTIAN LAETTNER OR ISAIAH RIDER. I WASN'T LUCKY ENOUGH TO PULL COOL GARNETT INSERTS

PHILADELPHIA 76ERS

I HAVE A SOFT SPOT FOR PHILADELPHIA EVEN THOUGH THEY KEEP RUINING MY LIFE. THE SIXERS HAVE BEEN AS BIG A TRAINWRECK AS THE HAWKS THIS YEAR THOUGH AND ARE ALSO IN THE PLAY-IN. THIS HAS CAUSED MY HAWKS GAME TO GET PUSHED TO 9:30PM BECAUSE OF A HOCKEY GAME, GRRR. IT WOULD BE FUN TO SEE EMBIID IN THE FINALS THOUGH, ASSUMING HE CAN STAY HEALTHY THAT LONG

THIS WAS AN INSERT IN 1996-97 ULTRA AND WAS KINDA TOUGH AT 1:72 PACKS. IT'S SUPER NICE LOOKING THOUGH, THIS JERSEY GIMMICK HAS BEEN DONE NUMEROUS TIMES AND THIS MIGHT BE THE BEST OF THE BUNCH. I JUST REALIZED THIS IS A ROOKIE YEAR INSERT AND CHECKED SOME PRICES AND UH, THIS NEEDS TO GO INTO THE SPECIAL BOX WHAT WITH THE LOCKS ON IT

SACRAMENTO KINGS

IF THE KINGS MADE THE PLAYOFFS THIS SEASON THE HAWKS GOT THEIR 1ST ROUND PICK FROM THE KEVIN HUERTER SALARY DUMP TRADE. AFTER BEING IN THE TOP 6 MOST OF THE YEAR, THEY POOPED OUT AT THE END AND NOW ARE IN THE PLAY-IN HAVING TO BEAT THE WARRIORS JUST TO STAY ALIVE. I'M BEGINNING TO HATE SACRAMENTO, BUT I WANT THAT DAMN DRAFT PICK SO I'LL ROOT FOR THEM 

DID YOU KNOW HOOPS BECAME SKYBOX AT SOME POINT IN THE 90S? DID YOU ALSO KNOW THAT THIS CARD IS SUPPOSED TO BE REPRESENTING A COMPUTER MONITOR? IF THE OBSCURED COLOR DISPLAY/20 DIDN'T KEY YOU IN, PERHAPS THE SMOKY YELLOW BORDER REPRESENTING A CRT MONITOR PLASTIC THAT SOAKED UP FIVE YEARS OF CIGARETTE SMOKE DID. I STILL HAVE ONE OF THOSE MONITORS IN THE BASEMENT SOMEWHERE

LOS ANGELES CLIPPERS

AH, THE CLIPPERS. THE NBA FRANCHISE THAT MAKES THE TIMBERWOLVES LOOK LIKE THEY WERE BLESSED BY ANGELS. I DON'T HAVE A TON OF OPINIONS ON WESTERN CONFERENCE TEAMS BUT IT WOULD BE FUN FOR THE WORST FRANCHISE EVER TO WIN A TITLE JUST SO THREE FUTURE HALL OF FAMERS COULD HAVE THAT ON THEIR RESUME

I KINDA GOOFED ON THIS CARD AS 2000-01 FLEER FUTURES IS NOT A 90S INSERT AND ALSO NOT A PRODUCT ANYONE'S EVER HEARD OF BEFORE. BUT LOOK AT THAT GIGANTIC HOLOFOIL SEAM OVER ON THE RIGHT. IT ELEVATES AN ALREADY DECENT LOOKING CARD TO ANOTHER LEVEL

LOS ANGELES LAKERS

I LIKE THE LAKERS ABOUT AS MUCH AS THE CELTICS. THESE GUYS WOULD NORMALLY BE MUCH LOWER BUT PEOPLE ARE SO MAD THAT LEBRON IS THE ALL TIME SCORING LEADER NOW THAT YET ANOTHER TITLE FOR HIM IS GONNA MAKE THEM EVEN MADDER. IF A TEAM I DON'T LIKE IS GONNA WIN A CHAMPIONSHIP ANYWAY IT MAY AS WELL CAUSE A LOT OF CHAOS

WOOO A 1999-00 TOPPS KOBE INSERT! IT'S GOT A BAD CORNER AND IS NOT A REFRACTOR SO IT WON'T PAY OFF MY PHONE BILL YET. I AM GLAD I GOT A FEW OF THESE BACK IN THE DAY BECAUSE I SURE CAN'T AFFORD THEM NOW

NEW YORK KNICKS

THESE GUYS SHOULD BE MUCH HIGHER AS THEY HAVEN'T WON A CHAMPIONSHIP SINCE I WAS A BABY. BUT NEW YORK TEAMS ARE ALL SPLIT INTO TWO GROUPS OF ONE SNOOTY ARISTOCRATIC TEAM AND ONE WORKING CLASS SAD SACK TEAM AND THIS IS THE NBA ARISTOCRATS TEAM. I WON'T BE MAD IF THEY WIN, BUT WHEN THEY LOSE I'LL HAVE A GOOD CHUCKLE AT ALL THE MISERABLE "FUCK TRAE YOUNG" CHANTERS OUT THERE

1995-96 SKYBOX WENT INSANE WITH THE FOIL INSERTS AND THIS CARD IS NO EXCEPTION. I GUESS THEY SPENT ALL THAT MONEY ON THE METAL UNIVERSE TECHNOLOGY SO THEY HAD TO USE IT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE. JOHN STARKS SEEMED TO ME TO BE THE QUINTESSENTIAL KNICKS PLAYOFF PLAYER AS WELL 

OKLAHOMA CITY THUNDER

THE FIRST OF TWO TEAMS THAT DIDN'T TECHNICALLY EXIST IN THE 90S. I HAVE NOTHING AGAINST OKLAHOMA CITY, IT WAS A VERY NICE PLACE WHEN I VISITED. BUT I'M STILL A LITTLE MAD THAT THE SUPERSONICS DIED SO I'M SOMEWHAT CONFLICTED. THEY ARE A VERY GOOD TEAM AND MIGHT ACTUALLY WIN IT ALL SO I BETTER MAKE MY PEACE WITH THE SITUATION QUICK

1995-96 HOOPS WAS SUCH A WEIRD SET. THE BASE CARDS WERE BASIC AS HELL BUT THEN THE INSERTS WERE ALL COMPUTER GENERATED NIGHTMARE VISIONS. I WILL SOON BE SAYING SIMILAR THINGS ABOUT THE 1994-95 VERSION BUT 95-96 REALLY WENT OUT OF CONTROL. POOR DETLEF SCHREMPF IS GETTING HIS SHOT BLOCKED BY HIS OWN JERSEY NUMBER WHILE ORBS HUNT HIM DOWN WITH INTENT TO MURDER

I'M NOT KIDDING, LOOK HOW TERRIFIED DETLEF IS ON THE BACK

DENVER NUGGETS

LIKE WITH THE KANSAS CITY CHIEFS IN THE PREVIOUS FOOTBALL PLAYOFF POST, THE NUGGETS WOULD BE MUCH, MUCH HIGHER HAD THEY NOT JUST WON A CHAMPIONSHIP. I LOVE JOKIC BUT THE NBA IS EVEN MORE SUSCEPTIBLE TO DECADES-LONG DYNASTIES POPPING UP OUT OF NOWHERE AND I DON'T NEED THAT SHIT UNLESS IT'S MY TEAM THAT IS THE ONE STOMPING EVERYONE ELSE'S GUTS. ONE TITLE IS FINE, BUT TWO IN A ROW MIGHT HAVE SILVER GETTING SOME IDEAS

CLEAR ACETATE VAPORWAVE 1994-95 STADIUM CLUB MUTOMBO INSERT IS BY FAR THE BEST INSERT IN THIS POST SO IF YOU ARE TIRED OF HEARING MY NBA GRIEVANCES (AND NOT EVEN ON FESTIVUS!) I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO  JUST LOOK AT THE PRETTY CARDS AND SCROLL THROUGH THE REST. LIKE YOU WEREN'T DOING THAT ALREADY, LOL

ORLANDO MAGIC

IF IT WEREN'T FOR SHAQ I WOULDN'T GIVE A CRAP ABOUT THE MAGIC AT ALL. I'M COMPLETELY FED UP WITH FLORIDA TEAMS IN GENERAL AT THE MOMENT SO I WOULDN'T MIND IF THESE GUYS WERE BOUNCED IN THE FIRST ROUND. WHO ARE THEY PLAYING? OH. THE NEXT TEAM ON THE LIST. SIGH

I LOVE BASKETBALL CARDS WITH WOOD COURT DESIGNS. I LOVE CARDS WITH GIGANTIC TEAM LOGO. AND I LOVE SOME SHAQ-FU. THIS CARD GOTS THE TRIFECTA

CLEVELAND CAVALIERS

THE CAVALIERS WERE ANOTHER TRAINWRECK DOGSHIT FRANCHISE THAT MADE ME FEEL A LITTLE BETTER ABOUT MY OWN FAVORITE TRAINWRECK DOGSHIT FRANCHISE. THEN THEY GOT LEBRON, WON EXACTLY ONE (1) CHAMPIONSHIP AND NOW THEY ARE BACK TO MERELY TRAINWRECK. LEBRON'S GONE, I DON'T CARE ABOUT THIS TEAM 

YET ANOTHER EMBOSSED INSERT CARD FROM FLEER, THIS TIME 97-98 ULTRA. I DON'T RECALL SEEING A BASKETBALL HOOP USED IN QUITE THIS WAY ON ANOTHER BASKETBALL CARD. ADD THIS TO THOSE 90S CAVS UNIFORMS AND THERE'S ALMOST TOO MUCH ON THIS CARD

PHOENIX SUNS

THE SUNS WERE FUN WHEN THEY HAD CHRIS PAUL AND HOMETOWN HERO DEANDRE AYTON. NOW THEY'RE GONE AND I DON'T FEEL LIKE ROOTING FOR KEVIN DURANT ANYMORE. "A RING FOR BOL BOL" IS NOT ENOUGH TO GET ME TO FEEL GOOD ABOUT THE SUNS

I'M SHOWING AN ABSURD AMOUNT OF ULTRA INSERTS BECAUSE ULTRA HAD THE BEST INSERTS. THIS 94-95 CARD FEATURES GOLD GLITTER EMBEDDED IN THE COATING THAT MAKES THE NEON EXPLOSION BEHIND SIR CHARLES EVEN MORE AMAZING. THE PHOTO DOESN'T DO IT JUSTICE. FLEER USED THE SAME EFFECT ON THEIR 1995 TEAM LEADERS INSERTS

INDIANA PACERS

I MENTIONED EARLIER THAT OKLAHOMA CITY WAS ONE OF THE NICEST CITIES I'VE VISITED. INDIANAPOLIS WAS THE MOST BORING. GRANTED, I WAS THERE FOR ONE NIGHT 25 YEARS AGO AND THE WHOLE TOWN HAD CLOSED FOR THE EVENING BY THE TIME I GOT THERE BUT THAT'S MY IMPRESSION. MEH 

SOMEONE AT FLEER DISCOVERED THE CUT AND PASTE FUNCTION ON HIS MAC AND JUST WENT WILD

NEW ORLEANS PELICANS

NEW ORLEANS IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE NBA'S TWO WORST TEAM NAMES WITH THE BOBCATS AND PELICANS SO I'M NOT TOO KEEN ON THE FRANCHISE IN GENERAL. THEY'VE GOT SOME GREAT PLAYERS AND IT'S FUN THAT ZION IS ACTUALLY HEALTHY FOR ONCE BUT... UGH. THANKFULLY THIS IS THE LAST TEAM I HAVE ZERO MEANINGFUL OPINION ON, THE REST I GOT GRUDGES

IF YOU THINK THIS CARD IS EXCESSIVELY BUSY, YOU SHOULD SEE THE ONES THAT LOOK JUST LIKE THIS BUT WITH TEXTURED FOIL. THE SHOE TREAD DESIGN IS KINDA COOL THOUGH, YOU DON'T SEE THAT EVERY DAY

GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS

THEY ALREADY GOT 28 CHAMPIONSHIPS THIS CENTURY THEY DON'T NEED ANY MORE. AND AL HORFORD WOULD HAVE A RING ALREADY IF IT WEREN'T FOR THEM. AND THEY'RE GONNA BEAT THE KINGS AND COST THE HAWKS A DRAFT PICK. BLEARGH. SCREW THE WARRIORS

I REALLY REALLY DO LIKE THESE EARLIER MINIMALISTIC FLEER INSTERS. JUST A BOLD NEON OUTLINE OF A BASKETBALL COURT, VERY PRETTY. WAIT... IS THIS THE COURT THEY CUT AND PASTED FOR THAT REGGIE MILLER CARD?

DALLAS MAVERICKS

LUKA DONCIC IS NOT ALLOWED TO BE IN THE NBA FINALS UNLESS HE IS FACING TRAE YOUNG AND THE HAWKS. SORRY, THEM'S THE RULES. THE HAWKS ARE LOTTERY BOUND THIS YEAR SO SORRY DALLAS, ENJOY YOUR RANGERS TITLE BECAUSE THE MAVS ARE FORBIDDEN TO MAKE IT OUT OF THE FIRST ROUND

95-96 WENT CRAZY WITH THE COMPUTER GRAPHICS BUT 1994-95 HOOPS DID THE SAME WITH THE FOIL. LOOK AT THIS! RAINBOW SUPERFRACTOR DESIGN ETCHED FOIL THAT COVERS HALF THE CARD. THE RAINBOW IS ALL RANDOM DEPENDING ON WHEN IT WAS STAMPED ON THE CARD SO NO TWO CARDS ARE EXACTLY ALIKE EITHER. PLUS THERE'S A SILVER FOIL PARALLEL. AND ALL OF IT HAS SUFFERED FROM THE FOIL ROT THAT PLAGUED A LOT OF SETS FROM THE 90S SO YOU MIGHT SEE SOME CHUNKS RANDOMLY MISSING. THIS SET IS AWESOME, I'D COLLECT IT ALL IF I HAD SEEN EVEN A SINGLE CARD OF IT FOR SALE SINCE I RIPPED THESE HOOPS PACKS THIRTY YEARS AGO

MIAMI HEAT

THE MIAMI HEAT ARE MY #2 FLORIDA PAIN IN THE ASS TEAMS SECOND ONLY TO THE MIAMI MARLINS AND YOU KNOW WHAT A PAIN IN THE ASS THEY ARE. NOT ONLY DO THEY HAVE A BUNCH OF CHAMPIONSHIPS AND BEAT UP ON MY POOR HAWKS REGULARLY BUT THEY ALSO RUINED AL HORFORD'S CHANCE TO GET A RING LAST YEAR. OOOOH HOW I HATES THEM. THEY ADMITTEDLY HAVE NEVER THROWN A BEANBALL AT RONALD ACUÑA JR. AT LEAST

HA HA, REMEMBER WHEN THIS GUY WAS KNOWN AS BABY JORDAN? SPEAKING OF JORDAN

CHICAGO BULLS

I NORMALLY DON'T MIND THE BULLS NOW THAT THEY SUCK, BUT THE HAWKS GOTTA BEAT THEM TO KEEP UP THEIR PERFECT PLAY-IN GAME RECORD SO THEY CAN GO JUMP IN LAKE MICHIGAN. I FEEL A LITTLE BAD BECAUSE BULLS FANS ONLINE SEEM TO BE SUFFERING IN DESPAIR TO AN ALMOST WORRYING EXTENT, EVEN WORSE THAN THE PANICKY HAWKS CROWD CURRENTLY MELTING DOWN BECAUSE VIT KREJCI WAS LEFT OFF THE PLAYOFF ROSTER. I GUESS THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR TEAM WAS THE BEST OF ALL TIME THIRTY YEARS AGO AND HAVEN'T DONE SQUAT SINCE. DON'T CARE, I AM NOT INTERSTED IN RANDOMIZING TANKATHON A THOUSAND TIMES SEEING IF I CAN GET THE HAWKS THE #1 PICK IN THE LOTTERY, THEY GOTTA GO DOWN

SEEING ALL THE JORDAN INSERTS IN MY BASKETBALL BOX RILED UP ALL MY ANCIENT GRUDGES BUT I LIKED THIS ONE BECAUSE THE ODD SHADOWS MAKE IT LOOK LIKE MICHAEL HAS GOOGLY EYES

PREDICTION TIME! CELTICS OVER WOLVES WOULD MAKE ME VERY HAPPY. BUT IT'S A PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION YEAR SO I'M NOT ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY. NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY EVER AGAIN. A PLAY-IN TEAM IS NOT GETTING TO THE FINALS TWO YEARS IN A ROW SO IT'S GOTTA BE

MAVERICKS OVER PACERS IN SIX

ENJOY THE HOOPIES KIDDOS! OR AT LEAST THE ONE GUY WHO READS THIS BLOG WHO ACTUALLY ENJOYS BASKETBALL. YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE LEFT READING THIS SO THANKS FOR THAT!