Topps Basketball Poem #9 - Two Blazers

All right. Sadly we have come to the end the basketball poetry on Cardboard Junkie. These final two poems were composed by Madding of Cards on Cards. Madding is a huge Blazers fan so it's appropriate he got the pair of Portlanders.


Tom, a tall baller
Tough to replace Walton
Peak of his career

Brewer was a bust
His son should do him proud
Too bad the Jazz suck


Two heartfelt haikus from a Blazers fan. that's it for the poetry folks, if you want more then get writing!

Topps Basketball Poem #8 - Mystery

Only two basketball poems to go. I bet most of you forgot what this was all about in the first place, eh? Matt F. requested Junior Bridgeman for his mini, but Thorzul nabbed that one first. Matt instead made a plea for a good mini card in his haiku:

Dayf, pick a good one please
The shorter shorts the better
Afro would be great


If it's short shorts you want, it's short shorts you get! No afro though, will a mullet do?

Topps Basketball Poem #7 - Mystery

I bet you thought I forgot about these, eh? Well, yeah. I kinda did. this one here is from Sam who got a Sonny Parker mini card in return for this poem.

O mini, O mini,

how mini you are?

so mini, so mini,

your like a toy car.

haha i tried!

Hey, he asked for Larry Bird and got Sonny Parker. I'm just glad he didn't drop a few F-bombs on me for that bait & switch. Besides, that's a good poem. Read it out loud three times fast and try not to laugh. Go ahead, I dare you. Couldn't do it, eh? That's GENIUS right there!

Topps Basketball Poetry - #6 Junior Bridgeman

Here's Thorzul's contribution to the poetry world. His limerick has a high degree of difficulty due to the awkwardness of rhyming the these guys' names. If he could have snuck Larry Krystkowiak into his masterpiece, he'd be Poet Laureate right now.


Your shirt's number 2 is retired.
Your play, it was great and admired.
Stellar play beside Bob*,
While Moncrief did his job,
Ensured Don Nelson never got fired.

* (Lanier)

Topps Basketball Poetry - #5 John Williamson

Today we have a Limerick dedicated to John Williamson's short shorts courtesy of reader Alec J.

There once was a man with pants that were short,

They helped with his skills upon the court.

Then one day came a man probably unrelated to Chris Pronger,

He said, "Your shorts! AAAAAH! Please make them longer!"

But John just couldn't give up their support.

Thank goodness there are no NBA teams based in Nantucket or I'd have to cancel the poetry reading. I do regret not having ripped an Artis Gilmore card, as I would love to see some of the rhymes for afro.

Topps Basketball Poem #4 - Not Reggie Theus

Jason claimed Reggie Theus, but alas, he had already been chosen. Always looking on the bright side, Jason penned our first limerick:

I claimed a card from a Junkie
I thought I was pretty lucky
But the Theus was gone
So now I will yawn
When I get a player who's sucky

Now, tell me with a straight face that that Pistons warm up nightmare is sucky. Ya just can't do it, can ya? Ha ha! Fell into my trap!

1980-81 Topps Basketball Boston Celtics Team Set

Here's how good Larry Bird is: In 78-79 while Bird was finishing up his college career at Indiana State, the Celtics went 29-53 and finished in last place in the Atlantic Division. The next year they won 32 more games and went to the conference finals with pretty much the same team plus Bird. The year this set came out, Larry and the Celtics won it all. Here are the team leaders:

#30 Larry Bird Scoring Leader
#31 Larry Bird Rebound Leader
#32 Nate Archibald Assist Leader

Larry Legend lead the team in points and rebounds and came in second to Tiny in assists his rookie season. Here's the all time leaders:

Havlicek, Russell and Cousy. Three all-time greats who still are the franchise leaders in those categories. Larry Bird is also all over those lists now.

#33 Nate Archibald

Tiny is in the Hall of fame and is one of the greatest point guards in the history of the game. He amazingly led the lead in both scoring and assists in the 72-73 season.

#34 Larry Bird

In the epic playoff series against the Hawks in 1988, while I was watching the games I would mentally add two points to the Celtics' score. I knew that if Larry decided he wanted a basket he would get a basket at any time. I was right.

#35 M.L. Carr

M.L. went on to be coach and GM of the Celtics, but he's best known for the steal and dunk that clinched game 4 of the 1984 NBA Finals against the Lakers.

#36 Dave Cowens

Ho hum, another Hall of Fame Celtic legend. Cowens once led the Celtics in points, rebounds, assists, blocks and steals all in the same season.

#37 Chris Ford

Chris played 10 years in the NBA and coached 10 years in the NBA. He's also credited with the first three-pointer in NBA history.

#38 Pete Maravich

Pistol Pete was so far ahead of his time it's not even funny. If he was born a decade or two later, he'd be one of the biggest stars in any sport.

#39 Cedric Maxwell

Cornbread was clutch, winning the 80-81 NBA Finals MVP. By the way, he hated the name Cornbread, but I can't call him anything else.

#40 Rick Robey

A big lunky white center picked third overall in the 1978 draft. Why do teams do that to themselves? His playing time dropped in 80-81 due to...

#97 Robert Parish

The fifth Hall of famer in the team set. Chief is kind of like Bill Russell lite. What the heck was Golden State thinking by trading him? By the way, note the photo in the card... You might see it later.

#254 Rick Robey Slam Dunk

No all stars in this set for the Celts, but there is a card of their center dunking. I wonder when the exact moment was when just dunking stopped being special and a player needed a high flying gymnastic dunk to get their own card.

Topps Basketball Poem #2 - Cedric Maxwell

Ok, all the basketball mini cards are now in the mail. If you haven't gotten yours yet, you will soon. Here's the second poem dedicated to a mini card, this one from reader Alex who nabbed himself a slice of Cornbread:

Mini cards ripped apart

Destroy the card

But not the fun

How true... that's like a zen koan right there. I need to go meditate on that a while.

Topps Basketball Poem #1 - Reggie Theus

All the '80-'81 Topps mini cards have been given away, but I didn't let them go without a price... I requested that each of the recipients pen a poem dedicated to their newfound treasure. The first one returned was from Steve of White Sox Cards. A heartfelt tale of love and loss. Break out the Kleenex for this one, folks.




Reggie Wayne Theus

I dream of a Reggie mini

Only one release beyond that bandaged knee

You wore a number of four plus twenty

Leading your Bulls to victory

With tamed ‘fro on head

Mini shrubbery of black

A ‘stache that rivaled Billy Dee

Life of Rush Street Reggie

Phil Ford, Phil Ford

Damn thy name and trophy

Mini Reggie, truly better than he

Now you are lost to his Airness

Dark clouds of regret and despair

Rain down upon suckled teat

You bit too hard the hand that feeds

Banished to Sacramento by way of KC

No flight of fancy or slight of hand

Prepared for the shore ahead

Now the king of kings

Polishes a tarnished crown

Tamerlane, masculine cow town

Storm and urge, the awakening

A gentle frost asunder assist

Sacramento, it goes on

*sniff* That's beautiful, man...

1980-81 Topps Basketball Atlanta Hawks Team Set

Here's the first team set I promised from 1980-81 Topps basketball. Yes, I'm doing 'em all, this is my basketball 'thing' this year just like the vintage college football cards are my football 'thing'. Hockey doesn't quite have a 'thing' yet, but I'm thinging about it. It's a loooong offseason. Even longer than the game 5 rain delay. Anyway the first team set is who else - the Atlanta Hawks.

#3 Dan Roundfield East All-Star
#5 John Drew East All-Star
#13 Eddie Johnson East All-Star

The first 18 cards in the set are All-Star cards, and the Hawks have three representatives in the subset. The Hawks were pretty darn good in the '79-80 season, they went 50-32 and won the Central division. They got bounced in the first round by the 76ers which is par for the course for the Hawks.

The backs of the All-Star cards act as the checklists for the set. The cards are pretty tiny so each card has only 14 or 15 players listed. Now I know what a lot of you are thinking right now... I don't care at all about these stupid little cards but dang they look familiar! Well that;s because the design is mostly swiped from the 1978 Topps set.

A little skinnier, the name and frame are both the same color and the position is moved to the bottom, but they are pretty much the same. I know Rowland Office is awesome, but back to the hoops.

#19 John Drew Scoring Leader
#20 Dan Roundfield Rebound Leader
#21 Armond Hill Assist Leader

The set is ordered by team with the exception of a few players who changed teams in the offseason. The Hawks are cards 19-29 and 126. The first three cards of each team set are team leader cards showing the leader in scoring, rebounding and assists. The leading stat is shown on the front where the position would otherwise go because the back shows a different stat:

Instead of the single season leader, Topps shows the all-time franchise in these categories. As you can see Bob Pettit was the franchise leader in scoring and rebounding while Lenny Winkens led in assists. Now to the individual players.

#22 Charlie Criss

Charlie came off the bench at guard for the Hawks, the 5-8 Criss has done a lot of color commentary on the Hawks' broadcasts.

#23 John Drew

A huge scoring talent for the Hawks, Drew was traded to the Jazz for Dominique Wilkins in 1982and ended up banned fron the league for drug violations.

#24 Steve Hawes

The uncle of Kings center Spencer Hawes, I remember Steve as the guy getting pwned by Artis Gilmore on a poster that hung in my room for years.

#25 Armond Hill

The Hawks starting point guard, Armond is now an assistant coach for the Celtics.

#26 Eddie Johnson

A great scorer who ended up completely destroying his life. Cocaine is a helluva drug, folks.

#27 James McElroy

James was a reserve guard for the Hawks, as evidenced by his extremely red warm up jacket. There are quite a few cards in this set with weird color.

#28 Tree Rollins

I was extremely impressed with Tree when I was a little kid. I asked my uncle one time if he thought the Hawks would retire his number and he said "for what? having the lowest points per game average?" I was disappointed, but still impressed with Tree.

#29 Dan Roundfield

Dan Roundfield was the first big star I remember on the Hawks. He could score, but was best known for his defense.

#126 Tom Burleson

Tom is one of those players who are stuck in another team after signing in the offseason. Note the Kings jersey. Tom was once the 3rd overall pick in the draft, appropriate since he scored 3.3 points and 3.0 rebounds a game while backing up Tree.


Last but not least, a cartoon. Everyone knows Wayne Rollins is Tree, but did you know Charlie Criss was known as Mosquito? And that's just one of his nicknames. I hardly dare to take a guess at the rest.