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Thursday, October 4, 2007

Pitbullshit

Topps pulled all Michael Vick cards from their upcoming releases last month once Vick was indicted. So obviously, a handful of Vick Chrome cards have wandered out into the hobby. Topps is pleading innocent, but I find it very convenient that four times in two years insanely collectible cards that were not meant for release just happened to slip through quality control and make it out to the hobby. That either means the person in charge of making sure cards that aren't supposed to hit the market don't hit the market needs to be fired ASAP, or that Topps is bullshitting us.

I'm sure some people will rush out and buy all the Chrome packs on the shelves looking for a jackpot. Auctions will continue to sell for outrageous amounts. and Topps will make a lot of money, again. As for me, I'm pretty much done with this year's football cards. Watching my favorite team completely implode sort of put a damper on my interest for football cards, and this nonsense certainly doesn't make me want to go out and buy any more. I know a hobby shop with old boxes of Fleer and Pro Set cards for 8 bucks a pop if I really need a football fix. You know what I do if I'm Michael Eisner for a day? This:

Any of you kids out there know what this is? Here's the scoop. Basically the US Postal Service goofed and printed some commemorative stamps of Dag Hammarskjold with an inverted yellow background. Some dude in New Jersey found a sheet of them and the USPS screwed him out of a fortune by printing 40 million more of the error. That's what Topps needs to do if they're serious about shunning Michael Vick. Print up truckloads of this card (refractors too, since they got out) and insert it into every pack released for a year. Football, Baseball, Basketball, Star Wars, Wacky Packages, all of them. Insert a hand written note from Arthur Shorin apologizing for the foul up if you're afraid of offending people. Make a big-ass donation to the Humane society for good measure. Make this card a dirt common instead of "the next Honus Wagner" as the douchebag investor who is buying up all the ones that hit eBay is calling it.

It's not just the obvious that's bugging me about this. The whole incident and how it was handled very badly irks me. If the cards are already printed, just put them in the set. there's no way none will get out if you pull them so don't bother. Just don't print any new ones for the upcoming sets. No sane collector would mind if Vick cards stayed in the Chrome set because it was too late to make sure all of them would be pulled. Also, after pulling card #111 they didn't provide a replacement. Topps did the same crap with the Alex Gordon card, and having a random hole in a set for no reason is just lazy. Put someone else's card in to complete the set. If you don't have time to insert them into packs, offer it as a free redemption. Give them to hobby shops so people can pick them up. Topps already ships out boxes of those retro rookie card giveaways, send out a box of Vick Chrome with them. Send them out in the mail to anyone who wants it. It worked for Napoleon LaJoie, it will work here. But no, pulling this crap generates publicity and sales, so fuck the collector. Sorry Topps, I love your cards, but you went to the well one too many times.

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