I have no idea how to create pages but I'll figure it out eventually godammit

Wednesday, December 18, 2019

ON THE SIXTH DAY OF AD-MAS

WHEW! YESTERDAY'S POST WAS A DOOZIE. GONNA BE LAZY TODAY AND DO ZERO

ZERO GIRL #5 JUNE 2001


SOMETIMES I'M SCROUNGING THROUGH CHEAPO BOXES OF COMICS AND I'LL SEE A NAME I RECOGNIZE AND GRAD THE COMIC. THIS HAPPENED WITH THIS WHEN I SAW SAM KIETH AND REMEMBERED HIM FROM SANDMAN. I HAD NO IDEA WHAT A ZERO GIRL WAS BUT SHE LOOKED KINDA LIKE A HIPSTER DEMON ON THE COVER AND WHO DOESN'T LIKE TO READ ABOUT HIPSTER DEMONS. AFTER READING THE COMIC I STILL DON'T HAVE A FECKIN' CLUE WHAT'S GOING ON. MS. ZERO HAS TELEPORTATION POWERS AND IS BEING MENACED BY PEOPLE WITH BOXES FOR HEADS AND SHE SHOOTS BLUE GOOP OUT OF HER FEET WHEN THREATENED AND THERE ARE MANY, MANY, COASTERS. SOMETIMES YOU CAN PICK UP A RANDOM COMIC AND ENJOY IT WITH NO CONTEXT AND SOMETIMES YOU  CAN'T. THE ARTWORK IS REALLY DANG GOOD THOUGH



BACK IN BLACK BAY-BEE

I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN THIS WAS A CARD BLOG AT ONE POINT. SPORTS CARDS WERE THE HOTNESS IN THE EARLY 90S THEN A STRIKE HAPPENED AND MAGIC SHOWED UP TO EAT EVERYONE'S LUNCH. THIS AD FOR THE NEW 7TH EDITION SET IS A TWO PAGE SPREAD RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE COMIC. WIZARDS OF THE COAST WAS ROLLING IN IT BY 2001. NEW ART BLACK BORDERS AND TOURNAMENT APPROVED IS ALL THEY NEEDED TO SELL LIKE HOTCAKES. NO RELICS. NO INSERTS. NO AUTOGRAPHS. NO PARALLELS. NO SHORT PRINTS. THE PREFERRED NOMENCLATURE IS 'RARES'. I'VE ONLY SLIGHTLY DIPPED MY TOE INTO THE MAGIC UNIVERSE MOSTLY BECAUSE I LIKE THE ARTWORK SO I DON'T UNDERSTAND MOST OF THIS STUFF. ESPECIALLY WHY THEY WENT BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN WHITE AND BLACK BORDERS, WHAT'S UP WITH THAT. ALL AND ALL THEY'RE PRETTY COOL ESPECIALLY IF YOU CAN FIND A PLACE THAT DUMPS OLD CARDS CHEAP BECAUSE THEY'RE NO LONGER LEGAL FOR TOURNAMENT PLAY

AND FOR THE RECORD, 'AND THIS TIME, SHE'S LEGAL' IS A REALLY CRINGY TAGLINE FOR AN AD. DO BETTER 2001


1 comment:

Fuji said...

Boxes for heads. Blue goop shooting out of feet? I feel like this is a sign that comic book writers are finally running out of ideas.