A FUN DAY AT THE ANTIQUE MALL

GOOD NEWS! I FIGURED OUT A THEME FOR THIS YEAR'S TWELVE DAYS OF CARDMAS. I STILL HAVE TO DIG OUT THE CARDS AND GET PICS AND WRITE EVERYTHING IN A RUSHED PANIC BUT WE ARE GOOD TO GO. HOWEVER I JUST REALIZED THAT STARTS IN FIVE DAYS AND I HAVE TWENTY DRAFT POSTS I'M IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING. IT'S FEAST OR FAMINE FOR YOU LOYAL BLOG READERS, GET FAT WHILE YOU CAN. SO BASICALLY I CAN GET MAYBE TWO OR THREE POSTS UP BEFORE HOLIDAY FESTIVITIES EATS UP THE REST OF THE YEAR. SO I GOTTA CHOOSE THE POSTS TO WORK ON WISELY. THIS ONE SHOULD HAVE GONE UP FOUR MONTHS AGO BUT I WAS AFRAID ONE OF YOU WOULD DRIVE TO GEORGIA AND BUY A THING IN THIS POST I WANTED BUT DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY TO GET. THAT WAS MY EXCUSE FOR PROCRASTINATING AT LEAST. BUT THIS IS A HELLUVA POST AND I WANT TO GET IT OUT BEFORE I BURN OUT AGAIN. YES IT'S ANOTHER ONE WITH AN INSANE AMOUNT OF IMAGES I SWORE I'D STOP DOING. JUST A WARNING TO THE BASEBALL CARD GUYS IN THE AUDIENCE: THERE IS A WHOLE BUNCHA LOTTA JUNK IN THIS POST BUT I PROMISE YOU IF YOU HANG IN THERE YOU'LL SEE SOME NEAT BASEBALL AND/OR CARD STUFF

IN A RECENT POST, I MENTIONED MY FAVORITE ANTIQUE MALL BECAME CONDOS OVER THE PANDEMIC LOCKDOWN. IT WAS MOSTLY MY FAVORITE BECAUSE IT WAS THE CLOSEST, BUT IT HAD A LOT OF NIFTY STUFF IN IT AND WAS A FUN WAY TO MURDER AN HOUR OR TWO ON A DAY OFF. WHILE I DO LIKE BUYING STUFF AT THEM, I VIEW ANTIQUE MALLS AS MORE OF A TRASH MUSEUM. A SINGLE BUILDING WITH JUST A HUGE AMOUNT OF COOL THINGS AND OBSCURE EPHEMERA JUST OLD ENOUGH TO CAUSE THOSE HAPPY NOSTALGIA NEURONS TO FIRE OFF IN YOUR BRAIN. A MUSEUM WHERE THE ENTIRE BUILDING IS A GIFT SHOP WHERE YOU CAN CHOOSE A TRINKET TO MEMORIALIZE YOUR FUN DAY FROM THE ACTUAL EXHIBITS. THANKFULLY THERE ARE A BUNCH OF THESE ANTIQUE MALLS IN ATLANTA AND IT'S JUST A MATTER OF DECIDING HOW FAR YOU'D LIKE TO DRIVE TO CHECK OUT SOME WEIRD OLD CRAP

MY SON HAD A JOB AT THE BRAVES' STADIUM THIS SUMMER SO I HAD MANY SUNDAY AFTERNOONS WHERE I HAD A FEW HOURS TO KILL BEFORE PICKING HIM UP AFTER THE GAME. USUALLY I'D HIT THE CARD SHOP OR BOOKSTORE OR MAYBE SEE A MOVIE BUT THIS PARTICULAR AFTERNOON I DECIDED TO HIT GOODWILL TO SCROUNGE FOR TREASURES. I SCORED A BINDER OF POKEMON CARDS FROM THE 90S FOR UNDER TEN BUCKS AT THIS ONE ONE TIME AND KEPT GOING BACK TO SEE IF LIGHTNING WOULD STRIKE TWICE. I FOUND NO CARDS BUT WAS FASCINATED BY THIS POSTER:

THERE ARE MANY THINGS I WILL SHOW YOU IN THIS POST THAT I HAVE REGRETS FOR NOT BRINGING HOME WITH ME, BUT THIS BY FAR IS THE BIGGEST REGRET. I DON'T REMEMBER THE PRICE BUT WHETHER IT WAS TEN DOLLARS OR THIRTY, I ONLY HAD ABOUT NINE BUCKS AND CHANGE ON ME AT THE TIME. I CAN RATIONALIZE THE DISAPPOINTMENT WITH THE FACT I DON'T REALLY HAVE ANYWHERE TO HANG THIS UP BUT I WILL ALWAYS CHERISH THE MEMORY OF SEEING SUCH BEAUTY IN PERSON

THEY ALSO HAD THIS POSTER FOR SALE WHICH WAS INTERESTING ENOUGH TO TAKE A PICTURE OF AS LONG AS MY PHONE CAMERA WAS ON. THIS ONE WAS MUCH MORE EXPENSIVE THAN THE ROSS FOR SOME REASON

AFTER GOODWILL I WANDERED NEXT DOOR TO BIG LOTS BECAUSE SOMEONE ON TWITTER MENTIONED THEY HAD DISCOUNTED OLD HANGER RACKS OF BASEBALL CARDS. I FOUND NO BASEBALL CARDS AT ALL, BUT THERE WAS SOME ODDBALL COLLECTOR STUFF LIKE BLINDBAGS AND A LUMP OF DIRT INSIDE A CARDBOARD BOX SHAPED LIKE A GOLD BAR WHERE YOU COULD FIND GEMS AND REAL GOLD. I ALSO FOUND THESE CHAIR MATS FOR TWENTY BUCKS EACH AND I TOOK PICTURES OF THE CLEAR AND FAKE WOOD VARIETY TO SHOW MY WIFE IF THEY WERE THE RIGHT SIZE TO WORK WITH MY ODDBALL DESK, WHICH THEY WERE NOT. I FORGOT TO DELETE THE PICTURES THOUGH AND ACCIDENTALLY UPLOADED THEM SO NOW THEY ARE PART OF THE NARRATIVE. DO YOU SEE WHY I SOMETIMES HAVE PROBLEMS WRITING POSTS FOR MONTHS AT A TIME NOW???

GOODWILL AND BIG LOTS WERE MOSTLY A BUST AND I HAD A LOT MORE TIME TO KILL. I REMEMBERED THAT THERE WAS ANOTHER LITTLE STRIP MALL BEHIND THE GOODWILL THAT HAD... AN ANTIQUE MALL! I HAD BEEN THERE ONCE AND SAW A GRACE JONES ALBUM THAT LOOKED COOL BUT I DIDN'T BUY IT. COULD IT STILL BE THERE? (THE ANSWER IS OF COURSE NOT, THAT WAS LIKE SEVEN YEARS AGO) BUT IT WAS AN EXCUSE TO CHECK IT OUT SO INSIDE I WENT. FOR SOME REASON I WENT IN, TOOK AN IMMEDIATE LEFT, CHECKED OUT A BOOTH AND INSTANTLY SAW THE THING THAT WOULD COME HOME WITH ME

NO IT'S NOT THIS. THIS WAS AT THE SAME BOOTH, WHICH SPECIALIZED IN VINTAGE TOYS AND ASSORTED COLLECTIBLES. I TOOK A PIC OF THE THING I BOUGHT BUT THAT WAS THE LAST PHOTO I TOOK. YOU CAN SCROLL DOWN TO THE BOTTOM IF THE SUSPENSE IS TOO MUCH. IT DIDN'T OCCUR TO ME TO TAKE PICTURES IN THE JUNK MUSEUM INTIL I WAS UTTERLY GOBSMACKED BY A SMALL PILE OF 8MM MARILYN MONROE STAG FILMS STACKED UP IN FRONT OF SOME VINTAGE HANDHELD PINBALL GAMES. UNLIKE LITERALLY  EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE BOOTH THERE WAS NO PRICE TAG WRITTEN ON THIS ONE SO I HAVE TO ASSUME THEY WERE STILL FIFTY BUCKS EACH. THEY WERE GONE ON MY SUBSEQUENT TRIP SO SOMEBODY GOT 'EM

SAME BOOTH, A CHEESECAKE PHOTO OF SARAH JESSICA PARKER WITH A CUT SIGNATURE OF DUBIOUS PROVENANCE FOR FITEEN BUCKS. I'M GIVING A BAD IMPRESSION OF THIS BOOTH, IT REALLY IS MOSTLY VINTAGE TOYS AND PAPER EPHEMERA BUT I TOOK PICS OF THE TWO MOST PERVY THINGS BECAUSE, WELL, I'M A PERV I GUESS

THE DAY'S REGRET COUNTER: 2

AN ATLANTA UNITED MLS CHAMPIONS METAL BEER THINGY. ANOTHER PIECE OF WALL ART I HAVE NOWHERE TO PUT BUT I'D BUILD A WALL OR SOMETHING TO HANG IT UP ON

THE DAY'S NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 1

MY MOM LIKES TO SEW AND I SAW THIS VINTAGE SEWING STUFF SO I TOOK SOME PICS FOR HER IN CASE SHE WAS INTERESTED. PARAPHRASED, HER REACTION WAS BASICALLY 'I GOT TOO MUCH OF THIS CRAP ALREADY'. IN REALITY, MY GRANDMOTHER ALSO LIKES TO SEW AND SHE HAD A LOT OF WOODEN SPOOLS OF THREAD AND OLD CLOTHES PATTERNS FROM THE 60S AND 70S AND LOOKING AT THESE IS DREDGING UP OLD FEELINGS

BOBBLEYHEADS AND AUTOMAGRAPHS! THIS APPEARS TO BE THE WESTERN ANNEX OF JT'S CARD SHOP. IT WAS FUN TO TAKE A LOOK BUT MY SINGLE DIGIT BUDGET MEANT THERE WAS NOTHING HERE FOR ME

THERE WERE SEVERAL FRAMED REPRODUCTIONS OF OLD COMIC COVERS FOR SALE. I TOOK A PIC OF THIS ONE BECAUSE I LIKE MOON KNIGHT, AND LO AND BEHOLD, IN THE TIME IT TOOK TO FINALLY WRITE UP THIS POST WEREWOLF BY NIGHT HAS ALSO BECOME A THING THANKS TO OUR EVIL MOUSE OVERLORDS

HELLZAPOPPIN!

I DISCOVERED THIS FILM LAST YEAR AND I ABSOLUTELY ADORE IT. IT'S KINDA HARD TO FIND BUT THE OPENING THIRTEEN MINUTES ARE ON YOUTUBE I THINK NEVERMIND THE WHOLE THING'S ON YOUTUBE. IF YOU DO NOTHING ELSE WATCH THOSE FIRST THIRTEEN MINUTES BEFORE IT TURNS INTO A REAL MOVIE, IT'S THE MOST LOONEY-TUNES-ASS CINEMA I'VE EVER SEEN. THE VERY FIRST THING THAT HAPPENS IN THE FILM IS SHEMP HOWARD PULLS A LEVER THAT DROPS A BUNCH OF CHORUS GIRLS DOWN INTO ACTUAL HELL FLAMES AND DEVILS WITH PITCHFORKS AND SHIT AND THEN IT GETS WEIRD

THIS IS THE PROGRAM FOR THE BROADWAY SHOW I THINK AND IT HAS GOT AN EXTREMELY COOL AESTHETIC. A BUNCH OF 1940S HEPCATS DEBAUCHERIZING AND CAROUSING AND GENERALLY BEING INAPPROPRIATE. THIS WAS THE LONGEST RUNNING BROADWAY SHOW FOR A WHILE BEFORE ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER RUINED EVERYTHING 

THIS IS ANOTHER FAVORITE BOOTH WITH JUST TONS OF OLD CARDS AND MAGAZINES AND GENERAL EPHEMERA. THERE ARE LIKE FIFTY THINGS I WANT TO BUY FROM HERE INCLUDING A PILE OF OLD VICTORIAN ADVERTISING CARDS 

FINALLY SOME BASEBALL! I TOLD YA TO HANG ON. THERE'S A FEW SPORTS MAGAZINES AND PROGRAMS AND PHOTOS TO GO ALONG WITH THE OLD AD CARDS AND BROADWAY PLAYBILLS. THIS ONE HERE IS A PAGE REMOVED FROM SOME MAGAZINE OR BOOK AND SIGNED BY HALL OF FAMER GEORGE KELL. I KINDA WISH THE WHOLE BOOK WAS THERE IT LOOKS LIKE A GREAT BOOK

SO THERE *ARE* SOME TRADING CARDS IN THIS PLACE BUT THERE'S A GENERAL RULE ABOUT TRADING CARDS BEING SOLD IN PLACES WHERE TRADING CARDS ARE NOT NORMALLY SOLD. IF IT'S ACTUALLY A GOOD DEAL, IT'S PROBABLY ALREADY GONE. SO YOU USUALLY ONLY FIND THE STUFF WITH LUDICROUS PRICES, LIKE THIS JUNKWAX ERA SUBSET CARD FOR TWENTY BUCKS. YES, IT IS MICHAEL JORDAN, BUT SERIOUSLY C'MON. SOMEONE WILL EVENTUALLY BUY IT THOUGH AND BE HAPPY THEY DID. I DO APPRECIATE THE SOMEWHAT INGENIOUS WAY OF SELLING INDIVIDUAL CARDS LOOSE IN AN UNMONITORED ANTIQUE MALL BY TAPING A CARD IN A PENNY SLEEVE TO A LARGE INDEX CARD AND THEN PUTTING A PLASTIC SLEEVE OVER THAT

THIS ONE GOT THE PRICE STICKER RIGHT ON THE CARD THOUGH

JUST LOL

IT MAY SEEM I'M DUNKING ON THIS BOOTH BUT IN REALITY IT HAS THE HIGHEST CONCENTRATION OF COOLNESS PER SQUARE INCH AND THAT'S NOT JUST BECAUSE IT'S ONE OF THE HANDFUL PLACES WITH CARDS. THERE'S TOYS, GAMES, RECORDS, CASSETTE TAPES, COMICS, MAGAZINES, INCLUDING DIRTY ONES, GLASSES, PENNANTS AND ALL MANNER OF TCHOTCHKES AND COLLECTIBLES. ANYONE WANT A GIGANTIC DARRYL STRAWBERRY SUPERSTAR STATUE THAT GOT HIT BY A TRUCK FOR THIRTY BUCKS? TOO BAD IT'S ALREADY SOLD 

REGRET COUNTER: 3

I REGRET I RARELY HAVE THIRTY BUCKS TO BLOW ON AMAZINGLY COOL RECORDS LIKE THIS. THERE WILL BE MOAR RECORD REGRETS LATER ON

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 2

I'VE ALWAYS ENJOYED CRACKED MAGAZINE BECAUSE WHILE IS IT NOT THE TOP-TIER HUMOR MAGAZINE, IT STILL HAD QUALITY STUFF AND SETTLED INTO ITS OWN PECULIAR NICHE. ONE OF ITS HALLMARKS ARE REGULAR SPECIAL ISSUES DEVOTED SOLELY TO FAMOUS MOVIE MONSTERS. THIS IS PROBABLY A BYPRODUCT OF THE MAG'S EARLY DAYS COINCIDING WITH THE HEYDAY OF FAMOUS MONSTERS AND OTHER MONSTER MAGS IN THE 60S AND CRACKED HOPPING ON TO RIDE SOME COATTAILS. I HAD SEVERAL OF THESE MONSTER MAGS WHEN I WAS A KID AND WOULDN'T MIND ADDING TO THE COLLECTION

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 3

THIS WAS THE TOP-TIER HUMOR MAGAZINE AND I'M MILDLY FURIOUS THAT WARNER TURNED IT INTO A ZOMBIE PUBLICATION RECENTLY. I GOT THIS GAME AS A KID AFTER BEGGING FOR IT AND WAS SOMEWHAT DISAPPOINTED IT WAS A GENERIC BOARD GAME INSTEAD OF THE TABLETOP 23-MAN SQUAMISH I IMAGINED IT WOULD BE. IT DISAPPEARED SOMEWHERE ALONG THE LINE, SOMETHING I DEEPLY REGRET JUST BECAUSE OF THAT AMAZING JACK DAVIS COVER

OH WAIT.

REGRET COUNTER: 4

I HAVE NEVER SEEN AND PROBABLY NEVER WILL SEE AGAIN A PETE ROSE MONTREAL EXPOS GLASS. I GOT A PIC OF IT SIMPLY TO PROVE TO MYSELF THAT IT EXISTS. A LOT OF YOU ARE SCREAMING AT ME TO UP THE REGRETS COUNTER RIGHT NOW BUT YOUR REGRETS ARE NOT MY REGRETS. I AM CONTENT SIMPLY KNOWING THIS EXISTS SOMEWHERE IN THE WORLD

LAST PIC FROM THE COOL BUT SPENDY BOOTH IS A TUB FULL OF VINTAGEY COMICS. I LOVE HORROR ANTHOLOGY COMICS AND WHILE MY FAVES ARE OLD EC REPRINTS AND DC TITLES FROM THE 60S AND 70S I DO HAVE A SOMEWHAT BEMUSED APPRECIATION FOR THE MARVEL HORROR TITLES. MARVEL HORROR FALLS INTO TWO CATEGORIES: AWKWARDLY SHOVING A CLASSIC MONSTER INTO A SUPERHERO MOLD LIKE WITH WEREWOLF BY NIGHT OR TOMB OF DRACULA, OR A WEIRDLY POSITIVE APING OF THE EC HORROR TALES. IN EC COMICS AND ITS DC DESCENDENTS THERE'S A LOT OF TWIST ENDINGS WHERE THE VICTIM SUFFERS A HORRIBLE AND SOMEWHAT DESERVED FATE. THEY ARE VERY DARK AND MEAN SPIRITED ABOUT THEIR TERRIFYING TALES. MARVEL IS ALMOST THE EXACT OPPOSITE, IN MOST OF THE STORIES I'VE READ THEY END UP WITH LEGIT HAPPY ENDINGS WHERE EVERYTHING WORKS OUT IN THE END. IN A HORROR COMIC! IT SOUNDS ABSURD ESPECIALLY NOW THAT THE MOST VILE, DISGUSTING HORROR STORIES ARE MAINSTREAM BUT IT WEIRDLY WORKS. IT HELPS WHEN JACK KIRBY OR STEVE DITKO IS DRAWING THE COMIC TO BE SURE. SONIC THE HEDGEHOG HAS NEVER BEEN MY THING BUT I WAS A LITTLE STUNNED THAT THE SONIC COMIC THAT CAME OUT AFTER THE 90S COMIC CRASH COST SIX TIMES AS MUCH AS THE HORROR COMIC THAT'S OLDER THAN I AM. I DON'T KNOW IF I REGRET I DIDN'T BUY THE COMIC WITH THE GIANT MONKEY ON THE COVER OR THAT I LIVE IN A WORLD WHERE SONIC IS THAT MUCH MORE POPULAR THAN COMICS WITH GIANT MONKEYS ON THE COVER BUT I'M PRETTY SURE I REGRET SOMETHING

REGRET COUNTER: 5

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 4

I HAD THIS TOY AS A TINY TINY CHILD AND I REMEMBER PLAYING IT BY MYSELF IN MY GRANDPARENTS'S FLORIDA ROOM AND THINKING IT WAS ABSURD THAT IT WAS BASICALLY A CRAPSHOOT WHEN YOU THREW THE BEANBAG AT A SQUARE TRYING TO GET AN X OR AN O. IT WAS HARD ENOUGH TO HIT THE SQUARE YOU WERE AIMING AT WHEN YOU WERE A LITTLE KID, LET ALONE HIT IT AT THE EXACT SPOT SO IT SPUN TO THE SYMBOL YOU WANTED AND NOT HIT IT TOO HARD SO IT SPUN MORE THAN ONCE AND LANDED ON THE WRONG ONE. I DIDN'T EVEN LOOK AT THE PRICE FOR THIS THING, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE PRICE OF MY YOUTH

WARIO HOT WHEELS!!!

I HAVE NOTHING TO SAY ABOUT THIS OTHER THAN WARIO HOT WHEELS!!!

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 5

THIS IS THE COCA-COLA CAPITAL OF THE WORLD THESE ANCIENT WOODEN COCA-COLA CRATES CAN STILL BE FOUND EVERYWHERE. IT MIGHT BE A LAW THAT TO GET YOUR ANTIQUE STORE LICENSE YOU MUST HAVE AT LEAST ONE OF THESE ON THE PREMISES AT ALL TIME, EVEN IF YOU SELL ONE. THIS IS ANOTHER THING WE HAD IN THE HOUSE WHEN I WAS A KID AND THAT CHUNKY RED-PAINTED WOOD HELD TOGETHER WITH METAL BRACKETS HITS ME IN A GOOD WAY

SOMETHING ABOUT THIS TABLEAU OF VINTAGE TOOLS WITH THE WELL-WORN MURDER AXE AND COLLECTION OF CLUE WEAPONRY AMUSED ME

THE AESTHETICS OF THIS ART PROJECT OF A BEAN SACK PLACED IN A RUSTIC WOODEN FRAME APPEALS TO ME IN SOME WAY. THE ONLY PLACE I COULD EVER THINK TO HANG IT IS IF I SOMEHOW BECAME THE OWNER OF A COWBOY BAR BUT WEIRDLY I DIG IT, AND NOT JUST FOR THE PONY

THE BIG CHICKEN

I LOVE THE BIG CHICKEN AND I REGRET NEVER CRAFTING MY OWN TINY BIG CHICKEN BIRDHOUSE WITH GOOGLY EYES MYSELF

REGRET COUNTER: 6

REGRET COUNTER: 7

I WAS TAKEN ABACK AT SEEING AN ELVIS EP FOR ONLY $2.50 AND THEN REALIZED THE DISC WAS MISSING. AFTER THINKING ABOUT IT FOR A BIT THOUGH I'M NOT CERTAIN YOU'RE GOING TO FIND A BETTER VINTAGE PHOTO OF THE KING FOR THAT PRICE. SOUNDS ODD, BUT I COLLECT CARDBOARD AND THAT IS A REALLY NICE PIECE OF CARDBOARD RIGHT THERE, EVEN IF IT IS MISSING THE WAX. TRY TO FIND AN ELVIS TRADING CARD THAT OLD FOR THE PRICE, I DARE YOU

MOAR CARDS!!!

THIS BOOTH IS FILLED WITH COMICS, BUT THERE WERE A COUPLE BOXES OF VINTAGE WAX PACKS ON THE COUNTER. NINJA TURTLES ARE COOL BUT I HAVE A HARD TIME BUYING PACKS I USED TO GET FOUR FOR A BUCK AT THE DOLLAR TREE FOR THREE BUCKS A THROW. THERE WAS A BOX OF BATMAN PACKS AT THE SAME PRICE. I DIDN'T GET TO CHECK OUT THE COMICS MUCH BECAUSE THERE WERE A COUPLE RIVAL NERDS HOGGING THE PLACE

UNEXPECTED RAINBOW BRITE BEER GLASSES PEERING DOWN UPON ME. I DON'T QUITE GET IT BUT I CAN'T REALLY SAY MUCH ABOUT PEOPLE'S TASTE IN BEER GLASSES. I'LL EXPLAIN LATER

UNEXPECTED WAX BOX IN A CASE. MOST CASES WERE FILLED WITH COINS AND JEWELRY AND ACTUAL VALUABLE STUFF SO I WAS HAPPY TO SEE SOME BASEBALL CARDS MANAGED TO WORK ITSELF INTO A SPACE REQUIRING A KEY. THIRTY TWO BUCKS PROBABLY AIN'T A BAD PRICE FOR A BOX OF THIS STUFF ANYMORE I GUESS. IT'S NOT THERE ANYMORE AT LEAST. I HOPE WHOEVER GOT IT DIDN'T END UP WITH BRICKS OR WISELY DECIDED TO KEEP THE WRAPPING ON

I RIPPED TOO MUCH OF THIS STUFF BACK IN THE DAY ESPECIALLY SEEING HOW I COULD NOW BUY A COMPLETE SET FOR THREE BUCKS AT JT'S. DOES THIS MAKE IT NOSTALGIC? KINDA, BUT I'M ONLY GIVING IT HALF A POINT

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 5.5

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 6.5

WE NEVER HAD ONE THIS OLD BUT MY GRANDPARENTS HAD SEVERAL TYPEWRITERS FROM THEIR OLD BUSINESS INCLUDING AN AMAZING CLUNKY ELECTRIC ONE. SADLY ALL OFF THEM DISAPPEARED AND I DIDN'T HANG ONTO ONE OF THEM. I TRIED PICKING UP A CHEAP ELECTRIC ONE AT THE FLEA MARKET YEARS AGO BUT I'VE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO GET IT TO WORK

THIS NEAT OLD FALCONS TEAM PHOTO CAUGHT MY EYE AND WAS ONE OF THE FEW THINGS IN MY PRICE RANGE. I MIGHT HAVE PICKED IT UP HAD I NOT BEEN A LIFE LONG STEELERS FAN, BECAUSE I ABSOLUTELY AM A LIFE LONG STEELERS FAN AND HAVE NEVER ROOTED FOR ANY OTHER TEAM EVER

OH SNAP! THIS IS A COCA-COLA/WPLO RADIO PROMO! JUST LIKE THE BOB HORNER PRE-ROOKIE CARD I COVETED WHEN I WAS A KID! NOSTALGIA BOMB RIGHT IN THE FACE

NOSTALGIA PANG COUNTER: 7.5

WE HAVE REACHED THE RECORD CRATES BOOTH PORTION OF THE POST, WHICH TERRIFYINGLY IS ONLY ABOUT THE HALFWAY POINT. THIS STORE HAS A TON OF GREAT STUFF BOTH ON THE WALL AND HIDDEN IN THE CRATES AND THERE'S ALSO A SEPARATE ANNEX OF EVEN MORE CRATES HIDDEN IN THE BACK CORNER OF THE MALL. I MADE A CONCIOUS DECISION TO ONLY TAKE PICS OF FOUR RECORDS BECAUSE OTHERWISE I MIGHT'VE COMPLETELY FILLED UP MY PHONE MEMORY. IT WAS NOT A DECISION TO TAKE A BLURRY PICTURE OF THE BOOTH BUT IT SORTA LOOKS COOLER THAT WAY??

I FOUND SOME REALLY QUALITY RECORDS AND THEY MOSTLY HAD GREAT PRICES. I'M NOT SURE WHY I PASSED ON THIS BILLY COBHAM CLASSIC OTHER THAN I WAS LOW ON CASH

CLASSIC HIP-HOP WAS A LITTLE MORE SPENDY BUT THEN AGAIN IT IS MUUUUCH HARDER TO FIND

ANOTHER KILLER ALBUM FOR ONLY SEVEN BUCKS. THIS ONE'S A LITTLE MORE COMMON THAN THE LAST TWO AND YOU MIGHT GET LUCKY AND FIND IT AT A THRIFT STORE BUT WITH ANTIQUE MALL PRICING THIS IS USUALLY LIKE TWENTY BUCKS

THE ONLY TRULY PRICY DISCS AT THIS BOOTH WERE THE LEGENDARY ONES UP ON THE WALL. I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER EVEN SEEN THIS ONE ON VINYL BEFORE. BUT I GOT IT ON CASSETTE SO NO REGRETS

A TINY PIRATE SHIP! VERY FUN. I ALSO LIKE THE HURRICANE LAMP NEXT TO IT

AFTER COCA-COLA PARAPHERNALIA THE SECOND MOST COMMON BRAND CRAP YOU'LL FIND IN ATLANTA IS ABANDONED EASTERN AIRLINES STUFF PICKED UP CHEAP AFTER THE BANKRUPTCY. DECKS OF PLAYING CARDS ARE THE MOST COMMON THING YOU'LL FIND BUT TRULY ODD STUFF LIKE THESE FIRST CLASS HIGHBALL GLASSES CAN BE FOUND AS WELL. GET HIGH ON THE DEFUNCT SKIES

RANDOM AUTOGRAPHED BASEBALLS IN A BOOTH YOU WOULDN'T EXPECT THERE TO BE HIGH-END SPORTS MEMORABILIA. THEN AGAIN I WASN'T EXPECTING TO SEE AUTOGRAPHS FROM TOM GLAVEN AND JOHN SMOKES EITHER

THIS IS HELLA COOL AND WAS JUST LYING OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF A BOOTH WITH A BUNCH OF LEGIT ANTIQUEY STUFF. SADLY THERE WAS NO PRICE TO BE FOUND ANYWHERE AND NO ONE TO ASK. I HAD MORE OR LESS DECIDED WHAT I WAS GOING TO BUY AT THIS POINT THOUGH SO NO REGRETS

NOSTALGIA PANGS COUNTER: 8.5

I REMEMBER SEEING THIS DISPLAY ALL THE TIME IN GROCERY STORES WHEN I WAS IN COLLEGE!!! THERE'S A FAN BLOWING AROUND LITTLE BITS OF STYROFOAM AND IT'S VERY NOISY! THIS THING PROBABLY GOT ME TO BUY MGD LITE ON SEVERAL OCCASIONS. THIS IS WAY UP IN THE FRONT OF THE STORE AND THERE ARE SEVERAL GIGANTIC PROMOTIONAL THINGAMAJIGS ALONG WITH IT BUT NONE OF THEM MADE ME HAPPIER THAN THIS ONE

BASEBALL CARDS AND PLAYBOYS 10% OFF. YOU CAN GET AN IDEA OF HOW LONG THIS POST HAS BEEN PERCOLATING FROM THIS PIC. THESE ARE BOTH NOSTALGIC THINGS FROM MY YOUTH, BUT... NAH

I FOUND A LITTLE ARTSY STALL WITH SOME NEAT FAKE VINTAGE STUFF LIKE THIS VICTORIAN STYLE POSTCARD BOOKMARK. I REALLY LIKE THE LADY MOON WITH A BICYCLE HAT ON HER HEAD. IT'S SO QUIRKY I COULD PUKE. EVERY GOOD ANTIQUE MALL SHOULD HAVE A PLACE PEDDLING THE FAUX NOSTALGIA LIKE THIS

THE SAME PLACE HAD THESE NOVELTY MOTEL-STYLE KEYRINGS AND I LOOKED THROUGH EVERY SINGLE ONE THEY HAD AND CANNOT EXPRESS THE DISAPPOINTMENT I FELT THAT THERE WAS NOT ONE FOR THE GREAT NORTHERN HOTEL, TWIN PEAKS, WA,  ROOM 315. I'M GOING TO ASSUME THOSE IMMEDIATELY SOLD OUT AND MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE

REGRET COUNTER: 8

I DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH MONEY AT THE TIME, BUT I WISH I HAD COME BACK A COUPLE WEEKS LATER WHEN I DID AND SNAPPED THESE UP NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT. 50 CENTS A POP FOR REPRINTS AIN'T THAT TERRIBLE NOW THAT THE ACTUAL CARDS ARE SO FAR OUT OF REACH

LOL

THIS WAS FIVE BUCKS

JUST LOL

THE KENTUCKY DERBY IS DECADENT AND DEPRAVED. AND YOU CAN BE TOO IN THE COMFORT OF YOUR HOME DEPENDING ON WHAT YOU DRINK OUTTA THIS

NOSTALGIA PANGS COUNTER: 9.5

I DID SOME SILK SCREEN ART IN HIGH SCHOOL AND IT WAS SUPER FUN. I WISH I HAD A WAY OF DOING IT NOW BUT I HAVE ENOUGH EXPENSIVE HOBBIES. HERE'S A WHOLE STACK OF USED SCREENS FOR THIRTY FIVE APIECE IF I RECALL CORRECTLY WITH THE DESIGNS STILL ON THEM. I LIKE THE FARMER DUDE ON THIS ONE

A PAGE OF OLD CIGARETTE CARDS FOR TWENTY BUCKS. NOT BAD, ESPECIALLY IF YOU'RE A FAN OF BOATS AND TRAINS. THESE WERE LOCKED UP IN A CASE SO I'M NOT 100% CERTAIN HOW MUCH THE BICYCLE PAGE COST

THE NEXT CASE OVER HAD A YOGI AUTOGRAPH HIDDEN BEHIND SOME OLD TOYS. IF YOU LOOK CAREFULLY IN THE MIRRORED BACKING OF THE CASE YOU'LL FIND A WALL OF FUNKO POPS AND THE CLOSEST THING TO A SELFIE YOU'RE GONNA GET FROM ME ON THIS BLOG

THERE WAS A LITTLE SECTION SELLING TOYS AND THE WAY THEY PACKAGED RANDOM LOOSE VINTAGE GAME PIECES AND SMALL TOYS INSIDE JARS SEEMED INGENIOUS TO ME. SURE SOMEONE MIGHT BUY IT FOR THE SPARE SCABBLE LETTERS BUT MAYBE SOMEONE ELSE WOULD WANT TO DECORATE THEIR HOUSE WITH IT. VERY CLEVER

THIS GIGANTIC ROOT BEER TAP FASCINATES ME. I'D NEVER WANT TO HAVE ONE BECAUSE IT HAS TO BE AN ABSOLUTE NIGHTMARE TO CLEAN BUT IT'S MERE EXISTANCE MAKES ME SMILE

I WAS LOOKING IN THE CORNER WITH THE ROOT BEER BARREL WHEN SUDDENLY THIS NIGHTMARE JUMPED OUT AT ME. MY FIRST REACTION WAS THAT I HAD WANDERED INTO THE HERSCHELL GORDON LEWIS FLICK THE GRUESOME TWOSOME, BUT THE MORE I LOOKED AT IT THE MORE IT REMINDED ME OF DUSTY OLD LEFTOVER 60'S AESTHETIC I REMEMBER FROM MY CHILDHOOD. NOSTALGIA DOESN'T NECESSARILY HAVE TO BE A GOOD FEELING

NOSTALGIA PANGS COUNTER: 10.5

REGRET COUNTER: 9

NOSTALGIA PANGS COUNTER: 11.5

I REALLY SHOULD HAVE BOUGHT THIS TWO-PACK OF OLD VHS TAPES FOR A COUPLE BUCKS. I PROBABLY HAD JUST ENOUGH MONEY ALTHOUGH I MIGHT HAVE HAD TO GO OUT TO THE CAR AND DIG FOR CHANGE IN THE SEATS. A PETER DAVISON DOCTOR WHO EPISODE AND DEER HUNTER DOUBLE FEATURE HAS TO BE A WINNER. PLUS I PROBABLY MISSED OUT ON SOME AMAZING VINTAGE COMMERCIALS

ONE THING I NOTICED WANDERING THROUGH THE MALL WAS THAT THERE WAS WAY MORE BUDDHAS THAN JESUSES. THIS HAS NEVER BEEN MY EXPERIENCE IN ANY SOUTHERN ANTIQUE STORE EVER. I GUESS WHEN COBB COUNTY TURNED PURPLE WE ALL JUST WENT HEATHEN. WORTH IT

VIDEO GAMES! HOW FUCKIN OLD AM I THAT VIDEO GAMES ARE GODDAMN LEGIT ANTIQUES NOW. THESE WERE IN A CASE  WAY IN THE BACK NEXT TO THE OVERFLOW RECORD CRATES. THEY ALL SEEM TO BE PRETTY DECENT PRICES AS WELL. COLLECTING VIDEO GAMES IS MY SON'S BAG THOUGH, I HAVE ENOUGH COLLECTIONS

NOSTALGIA PANGS COUNTER: 12.5

THIS IS THE SAME CHRONICLES OF NARNIA BOX I BOUGHT FROM THE SCHOOL BOOK SALE WHEN I WAS A KID. I THINK I STILL HAVE A COUPLE OF THE BOOKS BUT THE SLIP CASE IS LOOOONG GONE. IT WAS NICE TO SEE IT AGAIN

DISCO LUNCHBOX

DISCO LUNCHBOX

DISCO LUNCHBOX

DISCO LUNCHBOX

DISCO LUNCHBOX

DISCO LUNCHBOX

THIS ONE WAS COOL JUST FOR THE CRAZY OBSCURE FORMAT. THE FRENCH CONNECTION ON CAPACITANCE ELECTRONIC DISC FORMAT, WHICH IS LIKE, A MOVIE RECORD??? I LEARNED ABOUT THESE IN ONE OF FOONE'S MEGA TWITTER THREADS ON OBSCURE MEDIA FORMATS AND WAS SURPRISED TO FIND ONE IN THE WILD

REGRET COUNTER:10

WHY DIDN'T I HAVE THIRTY DOLLARS??? RENEGADES OF FUNK HOLY SHIT. I WANT THIS HANGING ON MY WALL, SO FUCKING COOL

MY SON WAS OBSESSED WITH OLD CAMERAS FOR A LITTLE WHILE, I THOUGHT THIS SHELF FULL OF THEM WAS NEAT

I KINDA NEED A GOLDEN GIRLS PRAYER CANDLE. THIS CRACKS ME UP EVERY TIME I LOOK AT IT. LIGHT IT UP AND SEND MY PRAYERS TO ST. OLAF. I COULD NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS DECIDE ON WHICH ONE TO BUY HOWEVER I'D HAVE TO JUST GET ONE OF EACH

NOSTALGIA PANGS COUNTER: 13.5

I USED TO SEE THESE KIND OF OLD WELL WORN SCI-FI AND FANTASY BOOKS ALL THE TIME AT USED BOOKSTORES. THEY'RE ALL STILL THERE BUT THEY ARE MIXED IN WITH ALL THE NEW WELL WORN SCI-FI AND FANTASY BOOKS. AND COME TO THINK OF IT, THESE WERE FAIRLY NEW AT THE TIME. JUST SEEING A BUNCH OF SHELVES WITH NERDY BOOKS IS HEARTWARMING TO ME

AND NOW WE ARE BACK AT THE BEGINNING OF OUR JOURNEY. I KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO TURN INTO A POST SO THE LAST THING I TOOK A  PICTURE OF WAS THE FIRST THING I HAD SEEN IN MY ANTIQUE MALL TRIP. A LITTLE ZIPLOC BAGGIE OF VINTAGE TRADING CARDS. A COLLECTOR IS NEVER SUPPOSED TO BUY THE FIRST THING THEY SEE WHEN SCROUNGING FOR GOODIES, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ONLY HAVE A COUPLE BUCKS ON THEM. BUT SOMETIMES THAT FIRST THING REALLY IS THE RIGHT THING. HERE'S A GOOD LOOK AT THEM

THESE ARE FROM THE CHURCHMAN'S CIGARETTE CARDS WONDERFUL RAILWAY TRAVEL SET FROM 1937. THE CARDS FROM THAT PAGE FOR TWENTY BUCKS ARE FROM A SIMILAR WILLS' SET. I'M NOT A SUPER HUGE FAN OF TRAINS PER SE BUT THESE CARDS ARE ALL GORGEOUS AND UNIQUE. MY FAVORITE IS THE KEY WEST VIADUCT TRAIN WHICH SADLY GOT WIPED OUT IN A 1935 HURRICANE. NO ONE TOLD CHURCHMAN'S I GUESS. THE OTHERS ALL LOOK GREAT TOO, THE LIGHTHOUSE AND ALPS ARE PRETTY AND I LIKE THE AUSTRALIAN CAMELS AS WELL

THE BACKS ARE PACKED WITH INFO AND I MANAGED TO TAKE A DECENT ENOUGH PICTURE OF THEM SO YOU MIGHT EVEN BE ABLE TO READ THEM. SOMETHING ABOUT THE DESIGN OF OLD TOBACCO CARD BACKS MAKES ME HAPPY

WHILE THE TRAINS ARE COOL THE BIRDS ARE REALLY GORGEOUS. THE ARTWORK IS INCREDIBLE, THE COLORS REALLY POP AND I GOT A NICE SELECTION OF PRETTY BIRDIES

THERE WERE TEN SERIES OF BIRD CARDS FROM BAKING SODA MANUFACTURERS ARM & HAMMER AND DWIGHT'S SODA PRINTED FROM I THINK 1908 TO 1938. THE CARDS IN MY LOT ARE FROM THE SIXTH AND EIGHTH SERIES WHICH ARE FROM 1929 AND 1935. I THINK. THERE'S NOT A TON OF INFO ON BIRD CARDS OUT THERE. THEY'RE PRETTY AS HELL THOUGH AND I KINDA WANT TO FIND SOME MORE. CHEAP OLD NON-SPORTS ARES ARE THE BEST. 

I DIDN'T GO COMPLETELY EMPTY HANDED AT GOODWILL EITHER, i FOUND SOME NEW BEER GLASSES TO REPLACE ALL THE ONES MY KIDS KEEP SMASHING. I HAVE NEVER BEEN ANYWHERE NEAR OREGON SO DON'T KNOW HOW GOOD ROGUE BEER IS BUT I LIKE THE VIDEO GAME ROGUE AND THE LITTLE DED GUY MAKES ME SMILE. MAYBE HE DRANK FROM THAT ROOT BEER BARREL THAT HADN'T BEEN CLEANED PROPERLY

THIS GLASS IS FROM A LOCAL MANUFACTURER I ALSO HAVE NEVER HEARD OF BEFORE BUT THAT OWL LOGO IS SUPER COOL

LAST GLASS IS THIS FUN GUINNESS GLASS WITH A THIRSTY OSTRICH DOWNING THIS POOR SAP'S BEER, GLASS AND ALL. THIS GLASS WAS FILTHY WHICH IS PROBABLY WHY NO ONE BOUGHT IT BEFORE I SAW IT. I HAD A GUINNESS GLASS FOR YEARS BUT ONE DAY WHEN I WAS CLEANING UP I FOUND A FEW SHARDS OF IT UNDER THE COUCH SO IT WAS NICE TO FIND A REPLACEMENT. HOWEVER I REGRET TO INFORM YOU ALL THAT THIS GLASS LASTED BARELY A MONTH AROUND THE KIDS. GOODBYE THIRSTY OSTRICH, I'M GLAD OUR PATHS CROSSED FOR A SHORT WHILE

REGRET COUNTER: 11

THE FINAL TALLY FOR MY FUN DAY AT THE ANTIQUE MALL IS NOSTALGIC PANGS 13.5, REGRETS 11. NOSTALGIA WINS! I HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS LUDICROUSLY LONG POST REMINISCING ABOUT GARBAGE. NO, I REALLY DO HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT BECAUSE I WENT BACK LAST MONTH AND I'LL HAVE ANOTHER JOURNEY THRU THE ANTIQUE MALL WRITTEN UP SOMETIME EARLY NEXT YEAR. I EVEN PICKED UP ONE OF THE THINGS I PASSED ON THIS TRIP! CAN YOU GUESS WHAT IT IS?