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Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I <3 Mario Alejandro

Yeah, I know, we all do. But I <3 Mario more.

(<3 means 'heart, if you didn't know that already)

Mario is well known for his box break reviews and a little while back , he busted open a box of 2009 Allen & Ginter. Out of that box came some hits, obviously, since every box of A&G has something in it. Here's what he got:

Some of you might recognize that card on the top. While busting my own box of A&G, I came across the base version of that card:

I had a bit of a freakout when I saw this epic card of a Negro League star wearing a Braves uni. I went as far as to call it the Card of the Year, and I am unanimous in that. Building the full set of Red Moore minis from the base to the Bazooka is one of those long term projects that just got put on my To-Do list.

So a couple of weeks ago, Mario e-mailed me and asked if I had picked up any Braves autos lately and that he had a package coming my way, hint, hint. I thought that was really cool and wondered what I could send him in return. I've been looking for stuff to send him, but he cleaned me out of Cansecos and every time I find an Andrew Miller card, he already has 8 of them already. Even the ones numbed out of five. That's a supercollector for ya. So the package arrives and I'm thinking maybe Mario found something cool I don't have yet like a Martin Prado autograph and I open it up and see this extremely well wrapped card:

This, quite literally is the best card I could possibly pull this year. I'm fascinated with Negro League history, I'm a huge Braves fan and A&G is my favorite card set. I honestly couldn't top this if I opened a thousand cases. What's more, I told Mario I'd be on the lookout for a Jose or Andrew card he needs and this was his reply:

Nope. Nothing in return.

So no cards, eh? That's extraordinarily generous. Well, I really want to do something nice for him, so I've devised a plan B:

  1. Buy lots of GM stock really quick
  2. Infiltrate the Federal Government in the next two weeks
  3. Use my insider influence to monkey with the Health Care bill
  4. Hide a clause in the bill stating that every American has to get their health insurance from a single provider: General Motors
  5. Now that GM has an insurance monopoly, sell stock and become rich
  6. Take ill-gotten gains and put in all in time machine technology
  7. Try really hard not to get sick because if GM does health care like they do cars... whoa nellie
  8. Finish my time machine
  9. Test time machine on the neighbor's dog to make sure it's safe
  10. Send condolences to my neighbor for their loss
  11. Try again
  12. Hey, it works this time!
  13. Go back in time to the day I was conceived
  14. Pump my mom full of estrogen so I become a girl instead of a boy
  15. Grow up girly
  16. Meet and seduce Mario Alejandro
  17. Bear him many healthy children, mostly boys

Those Canseco cards are looking pretty good now aren't they Mario!

Thanks again for sending me the Card of the Year!

(just kidding about plan B, I'd never buy GM stock)


dayf said...

Step 18 of plan B: Tatiana kicks my butt before I even log on to E-Trade.

I might need to think about a plan C.

beardy said...

It's early, I've been at work for 2 hours, and this is disturbing.

Anonymous said...

This is one of the best plans to repay a card trade ever. Hands down.

Captain Canuck said...

a Keeping Up Appearances reference in a post about Negro League ballplayers.


dayf said...

Canuck: That's not a Keeping up Appearances reference that's an Are You Being Served? reference!

Uh oh, I just found episodes on YouTube.

Ooooh nice.

Motherscratcher said...

Ohhhhh...<3 = heart. Yeah, that makes a lot more sense.

See, I was flipping it the other way and for a moment I thought you were tea-bagging Mario. Not that Mario couldn't use a good tea-bagging, mind you. It just seemed kind of peculiar is all.