I have no idea how to create pages but I'll figure it out eventually godammit

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

I want to get High




NO NO NO.

Topps Heritage High.

Number Series.

Presented by:

TOPPS

2009 Baseball

Updates & Highlights.

Major League Baseball

6 Heritage High Number Cards + 2 Updates & Highlight cards + 1 Stick of Bubble Gum.

Packs with a relic card contain 7 cards.

Patent Pending.

Here's a pack to open you pothead degenerates. Do cards, not drugs!

633 Tony Gwynn

Cool stat on the back: Tony's 1st hit was 24 years to the day after his dad's first. Sadly I dinged up this card pretty badly with my keys. D'oh!

653 Nyjer Morgan

That DC on the helmet is pretty slick. If Liberty Media ever move the Braves to Bermuda for a tax dodge shelter I might have to become a Nats fan just for the swag.

533 Carl Pavano

fdgakjndf

No, really. fdgakjndf just about sums it up.

Abominations to the Lord

Get this CRAP outta my Heritage!!!
Actually the Masterson throwback uni is pretty slick, it just doesn't belong in my pack of Heritage.

CHR180 Brett Gardner Chrome 1361/1960

A lot of people on the Braves Beat blog were hoping for this guy instead of Melky in the Vazquez trade. I don't understand what Atlantans got against Melky. Melky's a good player dammit! Also: I know bupkis about Gardner.

519 Bud Norris RC

Of Bud, I know nothing. Bud looks like he may be familiar with the Bud, IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN AND I THINK YOU DO

583 Garrett Jones

I JUST saw this card on another blog and I wasn't paying attention enough to glean any info on this dude out of it so I could be able to write something coherent about him here. This is the problem with Heritage High: I DON'T KNOW WHO THESE PEOPLE ARE. Now, you could say this is a me problem and not a Topps problem, but I'm not the one selling nobodies for the same price as regular Heritage with two less cards in the pack. BRING BACK BOWMAN HERITAGE! Or Topps Total. Either one works for me.

I'M YELLING AND I DON'T KNOW WHYYYYYYY

14 comments:

I Am The Average Joe said...

Thought I was high or something for a second. I was like, "Thats not Tony Gwynn" HA!

Carl Crawford Cards said...

Brett Gardner is from SC (yeah!). At least last year between him and Cabrera it was statistically more or less even (ops+ just under 100) but Gardner can steal a base or two and is solid defensively. Cabrera brings neither of those to the table and, lifetime is a WAY below league average player with an ops+ of 88.

Jeff said...

You don't know who Garrett Jones is? Seriously? And you follow baseball regularly? Look up his stats last year and you will be pretty surprised. Of course, he could have hit 80 home runs last year and it probably wouldn't have been a big story because he plays for the Pirates.


The capcha for entering this post is "manglype", and that's what the 2 Topps Update cards are though. A big ole pile of manglype.

Captain Canuck said...

Melky.
A waaay below average defensive player.
And a guy who can't hit.
13 homers in the friendliest hitters park in the A.L?
He's Ryan Church, only older and paid more.
Perfect.

The Mojo Hand said...

If that pack was a bag it would have been very seedy.

4:20

JD's Daddy said...

Word. Who are these guys? The only reason I chase at all is that I am already 1-500 in, might as well go the distance. But never again.

dayf said...

Warning: Dayf is cranky in the morning.

Jeff: I follow Major League Baseball not AAAA. 21 homers for a last place club in your first full season 10 years after you're drafted for a team that traded away every single decent vet on the roster is only good in fantasy ball. Let's see if he can do it again then maybe I'll be impressed.

Crawford: The only plays I've ever seen from Melky have been ESPN highlights, but from what I've heard he's above average on defense. I guarantee he's better than Garrett 'totem pole' Anderson.

Canuck: At worst he's an average hitter and an average defender and a very average player.

AND HE'S 24.

TWENTY-FOUR YEARS OLD

AND HAS FOUR FULL YEARS IN THE MAJORS UNDER HIS BELT

Now, I know Melky's from the Dominican Republic, so let's just add three years to his age. Now Melky's 27.

HE'S STILL THREE YEARS YOUNGER THAN 30 YEAR OLD CONCUSSION ADDLED METS-RUINED RYAN CHURCH

Oh, and salary? From baseball-reference.com:

Melky:
2009 New York Yankees $1,400,000

Church:
2009 New York Mets $2,800,000

IF MELKY GETS HIS SALARY DOUBLED IN ARBITRATION HE'S *STILL* ONLY MAKING EXACTLY THE SAME AS CHURCH DID LAST YEAR

FOR YOUNGER AND CHEAPER AND BETTER AND NO METSRUINEDMUSHMELON

AND HE'S 24.

Dude, I know you've got problems with Frank Wren and you don't like giving up Vazquez, but bring some game next time.

Mojo 4:20:

DO CARDS NOT DRUGS!!!!!!!

Oh wait , you already do plenty of cards. Carry on...

Orioles Magic said...

Agreed about the Nats gear. Although they are the step brother to my O's, they do have some decent unis.

night owl said...

Your comment was more entertaining than your post. Drink less coffee and I think you've got something there.

dayf said...

BUT I LOOOOOOOVE COFFEE

COFFEECOFFEECOFFEE

Swag said...

Melky is not too bad defensively. Not as wizard or anything, but he has a cannon and can flash the leather. Gardener has amazing speed, and if he made a career out of pinch running, he would probably still end up with 300 steals. The guy stole I believe it was 19/20 for us when he was called up and played of the bench for a month or so. He is solid defensively, but his speed makes him look better. He has absolutely no power, but if he can bat above .280 consistantly, he'll do great legging out doubles triples and steal plenty of bases. Plus he's already shown that he can hit an inside the parker... but then again so has Prince Fielder..
I was sad to see Melky go, as dayf said, the guy's only 24. But when you look at it Gardener more than makes up for him.

Bo said...

Melky is not a star but he is at least an average MLB player, and one who is battle-tested at a young age. Once again Brian Cashman got deceived by how well someone pitched in Atlanta. Looks like he forgot how Chris Hammond and Jaret Wright worked for him. As a Yankee fan I hate this trade.

AlbuqwirkE said...

LOVE the high number series... HATE the updates and highlights inclusions.

Jeffrey Wolfe said...

I agree mostly with what you said about Garrett Jones but when you consider he posted those numbers in half a season, you realize why long suffering Pirate fans (like me) think he and McCutchen are our new saviors.
P.S. I'm talking about Andrew McCutchen and not Daniel McCutchen although he's good too!
P.P.S. You don't see me busting on Melky Cabrera.
P.P.P.S. I know. I know. Jones and McCutchen are going to the Yandees next June for a pile of magic beans. Probably Daniel McCutchen too!
P.P.P.P.S. Yes I'm still holding residual hostility toward Braves fans for 1992. Nothing personal.
P.P.P.P.P.S. Ok I'm done now. But only because I'm tiring of typing P's and S's followed by periods.